- Start with the easiest possible habit. If you’re not good at habits yet, then start with the most basic skills.
You will then want to practice the habit rules:
- Start by doing something crazily easy. It may even seem a little ridiculous at first, but just as we learned to walk with baby steps, so new habits are also best undertaken with baby steps.
- One Habit at a Time. This is incredibly important — most people ignore it because they underestimate how much focus it takes to actually stick to a new habit. It’s easy to start a habit, or even 5 of them at once. Sticking to them is another story. Don’t think you can change everything at once. Start with only one new habit.
- A Tiny Habit. Do not focus on big results as you’re forming the new habit. Make the habit as tiny as possible and focus on doing it consistently. Whatever you think you should do, cut it in half. Then, if possible, cut it in half again. This is enough for now. The results you seek will come later.
- Focus on Starting. The only thing you need to do is start. That’s the part of the habit that matters the most in the first month or so. Later on you’ll run a marathon. For now, just put all your effort into lacing up your shoes and getting out the door. If you’re meditating, just get your butt on the cushion. If you’re eating healthy, just get your healthy snack in front of you, and take the first bite. If you’re writing, just close your browser, open a text document, and type the first sentence. Just start.
- Try to Enjoy Doing It. It’s really important that you get positive feedback for doing the habit right away. Many people select an activity they hate, which is built-in negative feedback, and then wonder why they can’t stick to it. Do a habit you love, or find a way to enjoy doing the habit. Focus on the positive aspects of it. Also, praise yourself for doing it. Feel good about doing it. This is an immediate reward, and it’s necessary.
- Watch Your Thoughts. If you start to avoid the habit, or you do it but feel discouraged, or ever feel like quitting … pay attention to these thoughts. Where are they coming from? Are you rationalizing quitting? Are you giving yourself some negative self-talk? Those thoughts are just defense mechanisms your brain uses to avoid discomfort. Let them go, and don’t let them have power over you. You can beat them with some positive self-talk.
- Don’t Miss Two Straight Days. This is the key. If you let yourself miss a day, be absolutely sure, incredibly and powerfully sure, that you don’t miss a day again. Miss a day, and let all kinds of alarms go off: you should put yourself on emergency status and do everything possible to not miss the 2nd day. Don’t let yourself slip up again. If you do, you are never going to get good at habits. Don’t do it.
- Be accountable. Tell at least one other person about your habit change, and ask them to keep you accountable. A group of 2-3 people is even better. It increases your likelihood of sticking to the habit.
Keep these rules for building new habit in mind as you set out on a path towards new goals.